That Artsy Reader Girl is a Love Freebie. Now I read a decent amount of romance but lately I've been all about the mysteries so I was struggling to think of something. Until I remembered my other current love - Hallmark movies. It started with Christmas movies and the cozy mystery movies but lately I've been watching a lot of them. They're great to have on while you're doing other things because if you miss a few minutes it's usually not to hard to figure out what you missed. Based off of all my "research" here are my 10 Rules of Hallmark Movie World.
1. If the woman is wearing very obvious makeup including contouring she is either the villain or the soon to be ex. This is the same if the man has very styled hair or looks comfortable in a suit (especially if it features a pocket square and flashy tie).
2. The heroine will be wearing natural looking makeup and have a tendency to pull her hair up in a ponytail or messy bun. She will also have a fantastic collection of sweaters, cardigans, and boyfriend jeans. The hero will look good in a suit but hate wearing it. He will have a number of baseball style tees and maybe a flannel shirt if it's cold.
3. Appropriate career choices for hero/heroine:
Heroine - 2nd Grade teacher (don't know why it's always 2nd grade), Bakery owner/caterer, boutique owner, travel agent, veterinarian, innkeeper.
Hero - Lawyer (but only estate or some other way that enables him to help out his community), Boat builder (seriously Hallmark world requires a lot of boats), former professional athlete who is now doing something charitable, contractor/landscape architect, regular architect, guy from money who does either is involved in academic research of charitable work.
Exception - The hero/heroine can be in finance or marketing but only at the beginning of the movie when they're workaholics and miserable. There will be either a disaster or an inheritance which will show them what they really need to do to be happy.
4. Hero/heroine will have either no family and be all alone in the world OR have lots and lots of family who all have no boundaries. Frequently there is one of each.
5. If the heroine is walking a dog the dog will become out of control and land her in an embarrassing situation.
6. They will live in a small town or end up in a small town. If there is not snow there will be time on an incredibly clean looking lake.
7. Lacey Chabert will show up at some point. And if she doesn't Danica McKellar, Candace Cameron-Burre or Erin Krakow will be there.
8. Someone is going to have a quirky pet. Either a rambunctious (and enormous) dog, a cat who is always into something, or if they're in a rural setting a goat. Bunnies and tortoises and also possibilities.
9. There will be a best friend. The best friend is most likely happily married and will have no boundaries.
10. If the heroine is baking she may have just a bit of flour/powdered sugar artfully placed on her face but her apron/shirt will be perfectly clean. Hallmark world is a magical land or I am an incredibly sloppy baker.
Do you watch Hallmark movies? Do you agree with these rules?